MLNW
by K8BNimble
Summary: Carter has an unexpected guest arrive to retrieve something that belongs to Global Dynamics. As usual in Eureka, things go awry. Jack/Zane. Warnings for language and M/M relationship.  Don't like?  Don't read.


_This was done for P*rn Battle on LJ which can only be "One Comment Long" - hence the shortness. It's based on the prompt: Eureka, Jack/Someone, SARAH is watching. I made the 'someone' Zane. No beta on this - so all mistakes are my own._

_I own neither Eureka nor any of the characters. I also do not make money on this. I do, however, like taking the boys out and playing with them._

**MLNW**

Jack Carter walked into the kitchen and smelled garbage. Jo had forgotten to take it out again. Her smelly Thai food boxes were stinking up the kitchen.

"SARAH, spray some air freshener," he asked the house as he walked back in from taking the bag out. A scent was pushed out of all vents. Jack thought it smelled liked jasmine and musk which was odd. The supply Global Dynamics usually provided for the experimental home had scents like "Crisp Linen" or "Fresh Rain"

"Sure, Sheriff Carter. By the way, Zane Donovan is pulling up outside."

Jack wondered what he wanted. Jo wasn't here and it wasn't like they were together in this universe.

He opened the door to see the rebellious young man about to knock.

"Carter, Fargo delivered the wrong canisters this morning. I need to get them back. "

"Zane," Jack said. He had never noticed how handsome the man was. "OK, come in," Jack's voice got noticeably husky.

Zane looked at him oddly but stepped inside. The door shut behind him. "Where are the air freshener cylinders kept?" he asked.

Jack stepped very closely behind him. "In the closet by my room," Jack whispered in his ear. Zane took a deep breath and stepped away. His eyes widened.

"Did you by chance, use the air freshener?"

"Yes, why? Is that why it's so warm in here?' Jack looked suddenly flushed.

"Shit! SARAH lock the door!" Zane yelled and the house responded.

"Zane, you are very sexy," Jack said stepping into Zane's personal space. Zane was beginning to breathe a little heavy as well.

"That's the MLNW speaking," he said but he also stepped closer and wrapped his arms around Jack. Both men were half-hard.

"What's the MLNW?" Jack whispered just before he took a nip of Zane's lip. He followed with a long, slow swipe of his tongue which Zane answered with his own.

"It's a new chemical warfare weapon. Make Love, Not War. It causes victims to suddenly become incredibly aroused and incapable of fighting because they want to fuck instead."

"I know I want to fuck you," Jack said. "Is there any cure?"

"Only the release of the chemicals the body emits at orgasm. Hard to believe Stark thought of this before he disappeared."

"You said, 'hard'," Jack said as he groped Zane's groin. "And yes you are. I know I'm hard for you, too."

They began kissing furiously and Jack pushed Zane on the floor, ripping his clothes off. Zane helped.

A small red light in the corner lit up. "Sheriff Carter, don't forget to use protection. Safety first."

"Is SARAH's voice different?" Zane panted as Jack sucked on a taut nipple.

"What? Oh…Right," Jack whispered. He suddenly stood and pulled Zane up. "Bedroom, now!" He grabbed some cooking oil off the counter.

As soon as they arrived, Jack grabbed a condom from a nightstand and threw the oil at Zane. "Prepare yourself," Jack ordered as he began to unroll the condom.

"What makes you think you're topping?" Zane said irritably even as he uncapped the oil.

"My house, my condoms, my rules," Jack said. "Don't worry. I'll make it good."

They fucked fast and furious, several times over until the chemical was out of their system. Oddly, SARAH had chimed in several times with practical suggestions but now seemed oddly quiet.

"Um…well," Jack said hesitantly. He looked around at the total wreck they had made of his room. He peeled the used condom off in an awkward silence.

"Don't tell anyone, ever," Zane said as he wiped up his own mess from the bedding.

"Right," Jack agreed.

Zane was halfway out the door but turned around and said, "Er, Jack, you're amazingly talented for an old guy. Maybe..."

"Out!"

At Global Dynamics, Fargo stopped recording and restarted SARAH's program. He removed the mic from his head, quite pleased at how well his planned worked. Those guys were animals and he had the recordings to prove it!

_FIN_


End file.
